


Dessert of the Day

by paws_bells



Category: Naruto
Genre: F/M, General, Humor, Romance
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-04-25
Updated: 2016-11-25
Packaged: 2018-01-20 18:38:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 10
Words: 16,909
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1521377
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/paws_bells/pseuds/paws_bells
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Random ItaSaku drabbles/onesies featuring various universes and various storylines for your reading pleasure. Chapters may or may not be interconnected.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Title:** Dessert of the Day

**Author:** paws-bells

**Beta-ed by:** MelissaRose85

**Characters/Pairing:** Haruno Sakura and Uchiha Itachi

**Type:** One Shot/Drabble Collection (InComplete)

 

 **Genre:** Romance/General/Humor

 

 **Word Count:** 1314

**Rating:** T (Contains content not suitable for children)

**Disclaimer:** Naruto belongs to Kishimoto-san.

 

 **Summary:** Random ItaSaku drabbles/onesies featuring various universes and various storylines for your reading pleasure. Chapters may or may not be interconnected.

 

 **Created on:** 30/08/13

 

 **Completed on:** 30/08/13

 

 **Chapter Last Revised on:** 25/04/14

 

* * *

**Prompt:** **Non-massacre AU. Itachi has been secretly fascinated by Sakura for some time and uses an Uchiha family dinner as an opportunity to lay some ground work. Sasuke notices what his aniki is doing.**

* * *

 

Sakura sat on the edge of the engawa, her legs dangling from the wooden platform, and watched with mild amusement as the young children played amongst the adjacent bonsai garden. They looked like they were really enjoying themselves trying to catch the fireflies flitting about the place, and the carefree sounds of excited, youthful laughter filled the summer night.

 

It was the annual Uchiha banquet, and the festivities were in full swing as the entire Uchiha compound seemed to suddenly come alive for the celebrations, throwing open its gates and generously welcoming both friends and distant relatives to enter and join the revelry. There were people milling everywhere, and Sakura had just escaped the main hall to take a quick breather from the socializing – it seemed that her status as the Godaime’s disciple preceded her even amongst the Uchiha clan members, and before she knew it, she was dispensing medical advice left and right, for issues as simple as ear aches to indigestion and everything in between. Naruto, Sai and Sasuke had callously abandoned her to her fate, those heartless cads, the three stooges quickly and stealthily slinking away before they could be inadvertently dragged into her unfortunate situation, much to her immense irritation. It was at least an hour before the overwhelming interest in her abated, and Sakura quickly took the opportunity to excuse herself before people could start asking questions again.

 

The pink-haired kunoichi sighed exasperatedly; now she knew why Shishou immediately declined when the latter had received the invite to the banquet – she just wished that her mentor had been kind enough to at least impart a word of warning to her as well. Now, it was clearly too late to back out from the event, and she was also starving – she had not even managed to steal a bite before retreating from the banquet in the main hall, and she also had no idea where her traitorous teammates had gone off to, those asshats.

 

Quiet footsteps alerted her to the presence of a newcomer then, emerging from within the Uchiha Main House, and Sakura immediately tensed warily as she turned her head to see who it was. Emerald eyes widened slightly with recognition at the calm approach of a tall, raven-haired male, clad in a handsome black formal men’s kimono with dark grey accents. She knew this person; Uchiha Itachi – Sasuke’s older brother, the heir of the Uchiha clan, ANBU Captain, prodigy extraordinaire. Bound by courtesy, she started to move to stand up, but he simply waved her back down. Dressed in a beautifully layered but rather movement restricting furisode herself, Sakura was only too happy to remain seated where she was. 

 

“Uchiha-san,” Sakura greeted with equal amounts of politesse and caution, dipping her head slightly in a graceful gesture of modesty and humility before her host, as formal guest etiquette dictated.

 

“Please, Haruno-san, at ease,” he murmured with equal graciousness in return, even as he drew up next to her. 

 

Sakura’s brow knitted slightly in bewilderment as the man just continued to stand beside her and observe the children frolicking in the garden. The whole situation certainly felt rather odd to her, and it wasn’t long before she felt the intense need to fill the silence between them with conversation. She didn’t really know her teammate’s sibling very well, but it couldn’t hurt to be friendly and socialize a bit, could it?

 

“Tonight’s banquet was absolutely lovely, Uchiha-san,” Sakura politely ventured then, glancing up at her fellow nin. “Please convey my appreciation to Fugaku-sama and Mikoto-sama, if you will.” 

 

Calm onyx eyes met her gaze. “You’re too kind, Haruno-san,” he replied in return, simply accepting her compliments on behalf of his clan. “However, I cannot help but notice that you failed to sample the food before you left the table.”

  
  
Sakura’s face quickly turned pink with embarrassment and chagrin. Oh dang it, he had seen her. The heir of the clan had seen her. This was too mortifying for words.

 

She must have spoken her thoughts out loud, for he simply remarked. “You were nearly running for the door towards the end,” he pointed out very tranquilly. “It would be impossible not to notice your hasty departure.”

 

Sakura could not help herself – she ended up muttering a muffled expletive. “I just made a complete idiot out of myself back there, didn’t I?” she grumbled lowly at last. She had really believed that she was being discreet.

 

“Don’t worry, Haruno-san,” he commented. “Your requirement for some privacy is understandable, in light of the earlier chaos.” 

 

“That’s hardly going to make me feel better,” Sakura replied disgruntledly.

 

To her surprise, the Uchiha heir looked mildly amused, and she stared, momentarily surprised at the way his slight change of mood simply highlighted his considerably good looking features and made him appear even more attractive than he already was. She was so taken aback that she nearly missed his next words. “Some food might make you feel better, Haruno-san. If you prefer it, I believe you may find my brother and your other two teammates at the back of the main kitchen.” 

 

Sakura snapped out of her stupor when her mind eventually caught up to what he had just told her. Bloody hell. Sasuke’s brother was _scary_. She had only let down her guard for a brief moment and he had nearly bedazzled her with his appearance. Damn Uchihas and their pretty genes. No wonder he had such an impressive following amongst the Konoha kunoichi.

 

Sakura started to look a bit indignant then when she finally processed the rest of his words. “So that’s where those three nincompoops are,” she uttered, starting to stand up. “They are so going to get it from me for leaving me in a lurch like that. Thanks for telling me, Uchiha-san.”

  
  
“You’re welcome,” he answered. Then, he added softly, seemingly out of the blue. “Sasuke has informed me of your impressive taijutsu skills; if you do not mind, Haruno-san, I’d like to spar with you one day.” 

 

Sakura just stared at him in surprise. Uchiha Itachi, _the_ Uchiha Itachi, had just acknowledged her abilities and wanted to cross blades with her. The pink-haired kunoichi was so flattered by his regard that she was rendered momentarily speechless.

 

“…I’d be glad to, Uchiha-san,” she replied at last, and this time, he _smiled_ at her. It was just a small quirk of his lips, but the effect was devastating and it struck her completely dumb, and Sakura didn’t even know what to think anymore.

 

He politely excused himself to return to his hosting duties then, and the pink-haired kunoichi was left to dazedly find her way back to her teammates’ sides. Sure enough, the three powerful and high ranking Jounin were slumming it up in the kitchens like the Uchiha heir had astutely pointed out, hiding from everyone else in the compound and having a private party with free flow of food and sake. Sakura didn’t even administer the scolding that she had originally intended to give them as she just wordlessly joined them, still in shock over what had just happened.

 

“What’s wrong with you?” Sasuke demanded then, sensing something amiss with his best friend. 

 

Emerald eyes looked at him in bewilderment.

 

“Sasuke, your brother just very randomly told me that he’d like to spar with me.”

 

The younger Uchiha looked very put out then. “Is that what they call it now?” he simply muttered under his breath in return, and she stared at him, puzzled by how completely unsurprised he was by her shocking (at least it was shocking to her) statement.

 

“What do you mean by that?” 

 

Sasuke rolled his eyes. The whole thing was pretty obvious to him no matter which way he looked at it. “Sakura, you dumbass, it means that you just got asked out on a date by my brother.”

 

Eh?

 

Ehh?!

 

“ _Ehhhh?!!_ ”

* * *

_::owari::_

* * *

 

  **Questions That I Would Like To Answer Before You Ask: **

Hello there, everyone!! Welcome to my new (sort of) ItaSaku oneshot/drabble collection, and I hope that you have enjoyed the first installment so far! As mentioned in the summary, the various chapters here will all be random and very likely _not_ connected to one another, so please do take note. Prompts for each update will also be stated very clearly on the top – **FYI, I’m currently not accepting any prompts at the moment, so please do not send me any until I request for them, thanks.**

 

**xXxXxXxXxX**

 

As usual, I cannot promise consistent updates – I’ve been really busy with other responsibilities and life in general, but I’ll try my best to see what I can do. In addition, some of the chapters here will also be uploaded on tumblr, so please do not be surprised when you see the same fic floating around over at the other site.

 

**xXxXxXxXxX**

 

Thanks for your kind understanding, and as always, thanks for reading!! Until next time!!

 

**xXxXxXxXxX**

 

Your reviews fuel my passion for writing. So please leave a comment if you like this fic!

 

\--paws

 


	2. Chapter 2

**Title:** Dessert of the Day

**Author:** paws-bells

**Beta-ed by:** MelissaRose85

**Characters/Pairing:** Haruno Sakura and Uchiha Itachi

**Type:** One Shot/Drabble Collection (InComplete)

 

**Genre:** Romance/General/Humor

 

**Word Count:** 889

**Rating:** T (Contains content not suitable for children)

**Disclaimer:** Naruto belongs to Kishimoto-san.

 

**Summary:** Random ItaSaku drabbles/onesies featuring various universes and various storylines for your reading pleasure. Chapters may or may not be interconnected.

 

**Created on:** 31/08/13

 

**Completed on:** 31/08/13

 

**Chapter Last Revised on:** 27/04/14

 

* * *

**Prompt: Modern AU. High School Crush.**

* * *

 

Sakura very nervously straightened her plaid skirt and fought the urge to fidget.

 

The pink-haired young woman felt extremely self-conscious in her high school uniform as she stood outside the office door of Professor Uchiha. It was afterschool hours and the faculty hallway was empty, devoid of life, but Sakura was still feeling jumpy all the same, leery of running into people and having to explain her presence. Her palms were slightly damp with perspiration and even her clothes felt rather restricting right now – she didn’t quite remember her uniform being so tight that it felt hard to breathe – though that might just be her nerves speaking. She tucked an errant lock of her hair behind her ear and then tentatively reached out her hand to knock on the door, hesitating briefly before her knuckles made light, timid contact with the vertical wooden surface.

 

There was a slight pause on the other side, and then, she heard him give his permission to enter, and relief briefly inundated her before the unbearable tension rushed back again. Sakura wrapped her fingers around the doorknob and slowly turned it, opening the door slightly and cautiously sticking her head through the slight opening.

 

Uchiha Itachi looked up from his desk, his dark eyes immediately alighting on his visitor. Stacks of scientific journals and thick tomes were arrayed on his desk, and his computer screen flickered with light – he was obviously busy, and…he also wore a pair of reading glasses when he worked, she realized faintly.

 

“Sakura,” he greeted softly, with the faintest hint of surprise tinting his polite, modulated voice. He glanced at the clock hanging on the wall above her; it was already past eight in the evening. “It’s so late; what brings you to the university at this time?”  

 

Sakura bit her lips, and then she slowly entered the room, slipping the door firmly shut behind her as she did so. She shook her head slightly, and then she blurted out.

 

“Good evening, Itachi-kun. Am I… Am I bothering you right now?” she sounded very vulnerable, and that prompted the Uchiha to give her his full attention, this girl who was the longtime childhood playmate of his otouto, and who had adored his younger brother for what had seemed like forever. The young genius theoretical physicist set down his pen and removed his glasses, folding the template before slipping it into its storage case with an elegant slight of his hand. He looked at the younger girl.

 

“Of course not,” he told her assuringly. “You’re never a bother, Sakura. What’s wrong?”

 

Once again, Sakura just shook her head, and then, she took another slow, cautious step towards him. There was a brief moment where she looked increasingly panicked, like a young doe on the verge of bolting, before she seemed to draw herself up mentally and gave him a hesitant but brave smile instead.

 

She reached for her bag slowly, and then pulled out a rolled diploma to show it to him. “I graduated today,” she announced slowly. “We had the graduation ceremony in school earlier. …I was valedictorian.”  

 

He smiled softly at her then, an expression that made her heart ache because it was so _beautiful_. “Aa, I know. Sasuke mentioned that you were all graduating today. Congratulations, Sakura. I’m proud of you. You’re well on your way to being an adult now.”

 

At his kind, gentle words, the eighteen year old girl felt her earlier, wavering resolve harden, and her pristine emerald gaze grew firm as she quickly made up her mind to do what she had originally set out to accomplish.

 

“I’m not a child anymore, Itachi-kun,” she reminded him quietly. “So you can’t treat me like one anymore either.”

 

The young professor just continued to observe her with his sharp, watchful gaze, seeming to sense her odd mood.

 

“Remember the crush I told you about a long time ago?” she asked him then, willing her voice not to shake because this was taking more courage than she thought she possessed. “I told you that I loved this boy with my whole heart from the first moment I saw him, and you said that I should wait until I graduated from high school to confess my feelings, because Sasuke and I, we were both too young to handle our feelings for each other?”

 

Itachi appeared slightly concerned now. Of course he remembered. She had only been all of ten years old, a cute, sweet-looking little thing, with tragic tears filling her large eyes and bruises on her face from scrapping with his younger brother, and he had picked her up and soothed her on his knee after he made Sasuke apologize for fighting with her. His otouto was always so brusque with girls, and it seemed that he must have had said something to inadvertently hurt Sakura’s feelings again.

 

“Sakura, did something happen with Sasuke?” he asked softly, cautiously, then.

 

Sakura looked at him with large, beseeching eyes.

 

“It’s not Sasuke,” she whispered. “It has never been Sasuke.”

 

“That boy was _you_ , Itachi-kun,” she told him, much to his growing shock. “It has always been you.”

 

“You told me to wait till I’m older, so I waited. Is it okay to say it now? Can I confess my feelings now?” she asked him tremulously.

 

“ _I love you, Itachi-kun_.”

 

* * *

_::owari::_

* * *

 

** Questions That I Would Like To Answer Before You Ask: **

Another quick chapter before the start of a new week! The ending was a bit open ended, but meh. I may come back to this one again because I happen to find Professor!Itachi rather intriguing, but we shall see what the muse says about that, haha. Hope you guys enjoyed this! =)

 

**xXxXxXxXxX**

 

**Once again, I’m currently not accepting any prompts at the moment, so please do not send me any until I request for them, thanks.**

 

**xXxXxXxXxX**

 

Thanks for your kind understanding, and as always, thanks for reading!! Until next time!!

 

**xXxXxXxXxX**

 

Your reviews fuel my passion for writing. So please leave a comment if you like this fic!

 

\--paws


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Random ItaSaku drabbles/onesies featuring various universes and various storylines for your reading pleasure. Chapters may or may not be interconnected.

**Title:** Dessert of the Day

**Author:** paws-bells

**Beta-ed by:** MelissaRose85

**Characters/Pairing:** Haruno Sakura and Uchiha Itachi

**Type:** One Shot/Drabble Collection (InComplete)

 

**Genre:** Romance/General/Humor

 

**Word Count:** 1243

**Rating:** T (Contains content not suitable for children)

**Disclaimer:** Naruto belongs to Kishimoto-san.

 

**Summary:** Random ItaSaku drabbles/onesies featuring various universes and various storylines for your reading pleasure. Chapters may or may not be interconnected.

 

**Created on:** 03/09/13

 

**Completed on:** 03/09/13

 

**Chapter Last Revised on:** 30/04/14

 

* * *

**Prompt: Modern/Fantasy AU. Koi fishes.**

* * *

**  
**The young master of the noble Uchiha clan padded out of the Main House, silent as a wraith. It was the middle of the night, but a low, pregnant moon hung amongst the starlit skies, lighting his way as he gracefully stepped off of the wooden engawa and down the stone steps, following a short, well-worn path that led to the koi garden. He was barefooted, a dark grey yukata tied loosely around his lean, wiry form, his long, sleek raven hair bound at the nape, the silky ends trailing over the side of his neck and clavicle. It was the height of summer, and fireflies darted about lazily in the dark as they tried to attract their mates.

 

The koi garden of the Uchiha clan consisted of the largest body of water in the entire property. It was a tranquil but deep, naturally occurring spring that surrounded the Main House like a moat, and hundreds of beautiful, glittering koi fishes resided in that peaceful pond. Lush foliage and outcropping rocks surrounded it, lending it a tropical, exotic air that was also strangely relaxing to anyone who visited the place. It had been the pride of the Uchiha clan for generations, and when Itachi succeeded his father as the next head of the family, he automatically inherited the traditional Main House, filled with centuries of rich and colorful history, as well as its precious koi garden.

 

The koi garden possessed a secret though, one that only the active leader of the clan would be privy to, but Itachi had known of its existence since he was a very young boy.

 

He stepped into the serene garden, soundlessly brushing past the fauna and coming to a stop at the edge of the huge pond. Dark eyes briefly surveyed the still waters, and then he folded his rangy frame and sat gracefully on the stone outcropping. Almost instantaneously, masses of koi fishes swam up eagerly to him, rising up to the surface to be fed, their beautiful scales gleaming under the moonlight. The gigantic koi competed for the pellets that he brought with him, splashing and slapping at the water surface eagerly with their tail fins as he evenly distributed the food amongst them. It was some time before the feeding frenzy finally abated, and once all the food was gone, the fishes calmed once more, lingering about him briefly as if in gratitude, before lazily swimming away to the other parts of the pond.

 

Slowly, Itachi dipped his feet into the clear, cool water, and then, he simply waited. Lifting his face to the moon, he closed his eyes and seemed to luxuriate in its gentle rays, absorbing the sounds and the refreshing scent of the peaceful nature all around him, letting them wash over him, soothe him.

 

After a short moment, he eventually felt the telltale ripple of water lapping against his ankles, and it was all he could do not to smile. Careful to keep his eyes closed, he called out quietly.

 

“Won’t you come out tonight, Sakura?”

 

There was no reply to his question, and at last, Itachi opened his eyes. The pond was peaceful, no sign of disturbances whatsoever on its calm surface. The dark-haired male was undaunted. He continued to speak in his dulcet, lilting tenor.

 

“I’ve missed you,” he admitted softly. “Please, will you let me see you?”

 

This time, there was a reaction. In the pond a few paces away from him, a shadow flitted swiftly under the surface, agitating the waters; a pale gleam of pink, a sleek flash of glittering black and crimson scales, gone as quickly as they appeared. She was definitely still angry, but he knew that she could never stay mad at him for long.

 

Sure enough, after a while, the water stealthily parted over a damp pink crown,and bright emerald green eyes that were barely situated above the pond’s surface stared at him reproachfully. She was obviously pouting, and it was adorable.

 

Itachi could not help himself this time, he smiled. His usually remote onyx gaze was gentle, and the look in his eyes inadvertently soothed her temper as well.

 

“Hello, Sakura,” he greeted gently, and after a brief hesitation, she slipped underwater again only to reappear right before him. This time, she chose to reveal more of herself, her head bobbing above the pond surface, her long pink hair floating in the water around her lithe torso. Her lovely, heart-shaped face glistened under the moonlight, her soft mouth was pink and full, her dense lashes were beaded with crystalline drops of water, and her eyes were the deepest, most arresting shade of verdant in the world.

 

As always, she was the most beautiful woman he had ever met.

 

_Ningyo_.

 

Under the surface of the pristine water, he could clearly make out the bottom half of her body, the part that was more fish than human. Her coloring was a vivid crimson with beautiful black markings, and her lovely fins were long and flowing, her fluid movements extremely graceful to behold as she swam lazily to keep her place. She was a koi mermaid, a mythical creature of legends, and she had been living in the Uchiha koi pond for hundreds of years.

 

She looked exactly the same as the first time he had seen her more than two decades ago, when he was only a young boy. Now, he was nearing thirty, and she was still eternally youthful. Another hundred years from now, when he was no longer around, she would probably still look as she did at this very moment, perfection frozen in time, forever trapped in this koi garden, forever alone. The thought made his heart ache.

 

Sakura reached out to touch him then, her hands cool as she lightly caressed his leg. She looked up at him, and there was nothing but innocence shining in those emerald depths. He held out his hand towards her, and she automatically lifted her face to him, her eyes fluttering close, accepting his touch. Her skin was petal soft under his fingers, and he could not help but stroke her face tenderly. She nuzzled into his touch wordlessly, like an affectionate kitten.

 

His gaze softened. “Sakura,” he whispered her name again, and her eyes slowly opened once more, looking at him. “Will you remember me when I’m gone?”

 

Even though she could not speak, she understood what he was saying well enough. Her expressive features saddened, turned heavy with grief. She turned her face into his hand, and then she kissed his palm and fingers softly. Her feelings for him were obvious, and that just made their current situation even more painful.

 

Star-crossed.

 

If only she was human like him. If only he was a fish like her.

 

He had loved her from the very moment he first set eyes on her, but clearly, they were not meant to be. Perhaps, it would have been kinder for the both of them if they had never met at all.  

 

“…I…ta…chi.” Her voice was low, garbled; a sibilant hiss, and he stared at her in shock. She possessed no vocal chords because fish did not speak, but clearly, she was forcing the words out of her throat somehow. It obviously took her a lot of effort to do so, but still, she was doing it for him. Looking at him beseechingly with her large eyes, she silently begged him to understand.

 

“…Ai…shi…te…ru.”

* * *

_“A bird and a fish can fall in love, but where would they live?”_

* * *

  _::owari::_

* * *

 

 

** Questions That I Would Like To Answer Before You Ask: **

And here is number three! Thanks for the generous support, you guys! I’ve really been enjoying all of your sweet and wonderful reviews/comments/insights so far and I’m really, really happy to recognize the pseudonyms of a good number of you who have been loyally following my (highly sporadic) updates for years. It is nearly enough to make me cry, no joke. You lot are amazing and I adore all of you. (Of course, I adore ItaSaku more but I don’t think you guys will complain too much about that, hehe.)

 

**xXxXxXxXxX**

 

FYI, the term ‘ningyo’ is the Japanese term for mermaid. (‘nin’ = human, and ‘gyo’ = fish, when directly translated kanji for kanji, if I’m not wrong.)

 

For those who are unaware, ‘Aishiteru’ means ‘I love you’ in Japanese.

 

**xXxXxXxXxX**

 

**Once again, I’m currently not accepting any prompts at the moment, so please do not send me any until I request for them, thanks.**

 

**xXxXxXxXxX**

 

Thanks for your kind understanding, and as always, thanks for reading!! Until next time!!

 

**xXxXxXxXxX**

 

Your reviews fuel my passion for writing. So please leave a comment if you like this fic!

 

\--paws


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Random ItaSaku drabbles/onesies featuring various universes and various storylines for your reading pleasure. Chapters may or may not be interconnected.

**Title:** Dessert of the Day

**Author:** paws-bells

**Beta-ed by:** MelissaRose85

**Characters/Pairing:** Haruno Sakura and Uchiha Itachi

**Type:** One Shot/Drabble Collection (InComplete)

 

**Genre:** Romance/General/Humor

 

**Word Count:** 705

**Rating:** T (Contains content not suitable for children)

**Disclaimer:** Naruto belongs to Kishimoto-san.

 

**Summary:** Random ItaSaku drabbles/onesies featuring various universes and various storylines for your reading pleasure. Chapters may or may not be interconnected.

 

**Created on:** 09/04/14

 

**Completed on:** 09/04/14

 

**Chapter Last Revised on:** 02/05/14

 

* * *

**Prompt: Modern AU. Technologically-inept!Itachi**

* * *

 

“Seriously, Itachi, we really need to stop meeting each other like this,” Sakura remarked by way of greeting when her next door neighbor opened his door and ushered her into his apartment.

 

“Hello Sakura, thank you for coming,” the raven-haired male greeted in return, impeccably polite and proper as always. The young woman pretended not to notice how scrummy the man looked in a casual sweater and a pair of worn, comfortable black jeans, his feet bare against the carpet.

 

She busied herself by rolling up her sleeves and replied instead. “Don’t mention it. Now; what’s wrong with your computer this time?”

 

The Uchiha led her down the hall and into his study, where a desktop computer was sitting on his table. “It’s been running rather slowly recently, so I’d appreciate if you could take a look at it for me.”

 

“Alright, I’ll see what I can do.” Sakura went over to boot up the computer while Itachi went off to the kitchen to make tea for his guest. By the time the man returned, Sakura had already more or less figured out what the issue was this time.

 

“Goodness, Itachi. Your desktop is ridiculously cluttered – you need to clean it up more,” Sakura tsked irritably, though the man frowned slightly and set the tray of beverages on the pristine surface of his table.

 

“I always keep my desk clean,” he replied rather quizzically, and it slowly occurred to Sakura that he had taken her words too literally. The young woman could not help herself; she snorted softly in amusement.

 

“I didn’t mean this physical desk – I was referring to your virtual one,” she pointed out, gesturing to the computer desktop, which was filled with icons and shortcuts for various files. “I can’t believe you; I just got you to clear most of these a month ago, and now they are all back again. No wonder your computer is lagging so horribly.”

 

Sakura privately found it pretty amusing that her quiet neighbor was such an immaculate and fastidious individual in real life but had trouble keeping his computer in the same tidy state.

 

The man appeared faintly chagrinned by her mild rebuke. “I apologize; to be honest, I have no idea why all these icons keep appearing on my desktop.” He sounded genuinely perplexed too, and still smiling in amusement, Sakura just shook her head slightly.

 

“Just remember to get rid of them every so often then, and are you making proper use of the computer cleaning tools and defragging software that I installed for you last time?”

 

“I am,” he nodded somberly, passing her a mug of steaming ocha as he did so. Sakura accepted the drink gratefully and took a sip. She proceeded to nearly spit out the mouthful when the internet browser finally opened and revealed to her a screen filled with mental anguish and regret.

 

“ _Itachi_!!” she squawked in disbelief. “Why on earth do you need; wait, let me count – three, four five, six, seven – _seven_ _toolbars_?!!”

 

The Uchiha set down his own mug and leaned over from behind Sakura to see what she was talking about. The pink haired woman felt her cheeks redden ever so slightly at their sheer proximity. His crisp, refreshing scent teased her nose, and her face flushed even more.

 

Onyx eyes slipped over to glance at the embarrassed female. “…I’ve no idea how they got there,” he replied baldly at last, his face still hovering rather close to her burning one, his calm, placid expression studying her flustered features.

 

“Uhm,” Sakura floundered briefly for words, slightly rattled by the quiet intensity of his rapt attention. “I-I’ll just uninstall them for you, then. You don’t need those at all. I think the diagnostic tool also detected some malware; I’ll try to clear that for you as well, but you should take care not to visit any suspicious sites-” the pink haired woman would have rambled on even more if he had not interrupted her then.

 

“Ah, I think I know how those got there now,” Itachi murmured then.

 

Despite her frazzled demeanor, Sakura was curious to know. “How?”

 

“…I was informed that I won an iPad from an online drawing,” he deadpanned, serious as ever.

 

“…”

 

* * *

_::owari::_

* * *

  

** Questions That I Would Like To Answer Before You Ask: **

Ugh, I just like writing adorkable!Itachi too much.

 

I derived inspiration for this drabble from my equally adorkable Dad, who once got very excited when he thought that he had really won an iPad from one of those silly ads online. Evidently, Itachi’s level of technological awareness is even lower than that, ahaha.

 

As always, hope you lot enjoyed this!

 

**xXxXxXxXxX**

 

Next, a small handful of you had some enquiries about the previous chapter (the one with mermaid!Sakura), curious to know why she had been shown to be upset with Itachi at the beginning of the fic. I neglected to write the reasoning in (forgot all about it, actually), but she had been unhappy at first because Itachi had gone on a business trip and had left her alone for days prior to the story.

 

So that answers the mystery!

 

**xXxXxXxXxX**

 

**Once again, I’m currently not accepting any prompts at the moment, so please do not send me any until I request for them, thanks.**

 

**xXxXxXxXxX**

 

Thanks for your kind understanding, and as always, thanks for reading!! Until next time!!

 

**xXxXxXxXxX**

 

Your reviews fuel my passion for writing. So please leave a comment if you like this fic!

 

\--paws


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ItaSaku Random ItaSaku drabbles/onesies featuring various universes and various storylines for your reading pleasure. Chapters may or may not be interconnected.

**Title:** Dessert of the Day

**Author:** paws-bells

**Beta-ed by:** MelissaRose85

**Characters/Pairing:** Haruno Sakura and Uchiha Itachi

**Type:** One Shot/Drabble Collection (InComplete)

 

**Genre:** Romance/General/Humor

 

**Word Count:** 1308

**Rating:** T (Contains content not suitable for children)

**Disclaimer:** Naruto belongs to Kishimoto-san.

 

**Summary:** Random ItaSaku drabbles/onesies featuring various universes and various storylines for your reading pleasure. Chapters may or may not be interconnected.

 

**Created on:** 10/04/14

 

**Completed on:** 10/04/14

 

**Chapter Last Revised on:** 18/05/14

 

* * *

**Prompt: Modern AU. Itachi really likes Sakura but he never says a word to Sakura because his only interactions with girls are fangirls and include him constantly running away.**

* * *

 

 

Sakura knocked firmly on the door and waited for a response. 

 

“Enter.”

 

The pink haired female turned the doorknob and let herself into the office, bowing slightly in greeting before her quietly enigmatic colleague.

 

“Good afternoon, Uchiha-san,” The young high school teacher uttered politely and pleasantly to her fellow instructor, determined to be as civil as she could regardless of his infamously cool and distant demeanor. “I’ve brought the student records as well as the memo regarding the planning for the school festival; shall we get started?”

 

Dark onyx eyes met hers for a brief second before he looked away, centering his gaze somewhere over her left shoulder instead. The raven haired male nodded subtly, and Sakura ventured deeper into his office, taking a seat on the other side of his desk and starting to take out the materials for their meeting. Even though Sakura had only joined the teaching faculty of Konoha High this year as the new Biology teacher, she had already been picked to oversee and facilitate preparations for the annual school festival, and Uchiha-san, who taught Math and Physics, had also been chosen to be her co-organizer. The whole arrangement was a bit iffy to Sakura since it was obvious by now that the wildly popular and handsome Uchiha-san (he even had his own fan club amongst the female student body, complete with a large, loyal following) did not appear to like her very much, and the young pink haired teacher had groaned inwardly in dismay when she discovered her partner for this project.

 

For some reason unknown to her, Uchiha-san was always avoiding her. He maintained a fair distance whenever they had to speak, he always looked rigid and wary as if she was about to do something really awful to him, and he could never seem to look her straight in the eye, almost like he could not even stand having her in his sight. Sakura was bewildered and more than a bit hurt by her colleague’s abhorrence of her. He kept away from her like she was the plague, quickly excusing himself from conversations whenever she joined in, and for the life of her, the young woman just could not figure out whatever she had done to offend him so. He did not have any issues with the other teachers, and from what Sakura could see, he was also cordial and polite towards their fellow colleagues and students – so it was only her he had a problem with.

 

Enough was enough, and Sakura was getting really sick and tired of this constant awkwardness and unbearable tension between the two of them. The pink haired female had no idea why she was disliked so much but she was determined to clear the air and set everything straight before they embarked on this school festival project. It would be intolerable otherwise, for the two of them to remain in such a painfully uncomfortable situation for the next few months.  

 

“Do you have the proposed theme ready, Haruno-san?” the Uchiha enquired in a grave, solicitous manner, though he was still very carefully avoiding eye contact with her. The other teacher was also leaning back in his chair and rather surreptitiously moving away from the desk she was occupying, and despite her determination to be polite and cordial, Sakura could feel her temper rising rapidly, getting very close to flaring. The straw that broke this camel’s back was when the awful man tilted his head up and stared at the ceiling than at her; he would rather look at the ceiling tiles than at her – she was _not_ that repulsive!!

 

“Excuse me, Uchiha-san,” Sakura snapped at last, unable to tolerate this awfully rude and insufferable man any longer. This had been bothering her for the past few months and it was way past time to confront him about it. “Do you have something against me? I cannot help but notice that every time I’m around, you avoid me like you cannot even stand having me near. If this is such a huge issue to you, then I can always suggest to Principal Sarutobi-sama that we work separately from now on-”

 

For the first time ever, the Uchiha stared straight at her, his eyes widening ever so slightly in surprise, and if possible, he appeared genuinely baffled by her cool, clipped accusation, much to her own increasing confusion.

 

“That’s not it,” he interrupted her in a mildly strained tone at last, and her eyebrow raising, she waited for him to elaborate. He looked reluctant to speak, but she was not backing down this time, determined to have this whole problem between them sorted out once and for all.

 

“…I apologize if I have somehow, inadvertently, made you feel slighted; that was not my intention,” he spoke slowly and carefully at last, as if he still had trouble grasping the reason for her misunderstanding. “I didn’t mean to…”

 

For the first time, he was speaking to her directly and honestly, and Sakura’s head tilted in a perplexed manner as she sensed the genuine sincerity in his words. Her earlier sharp temper started to subside, just a little. Could this have just been a huge mix up? “You didn’t mean to…?” she echoed in a less aggressive tone, encouraging him to continue what he was about to say. However, Uchiha-san was floundering to speak, though he was also making a huge effort to continue to look her in the eye, something that she just realized in an abrupt epiphany that he had been struggling with all along. The poor man appeared mildly distressed by the situation, and suddenly, Sakura was starting to feel bad for forcing this confrontation without properly considering the other party’s point of view.

 

“Uhm, it’s alright,” she spoke at last, forcing an awkward smile of her own. “…I think I understand. I apologize too, Uchiha-san. I didn’t mean to trouble you – I’ll be careful to keep my distance from now on if that’s what you-”

 

“That’s not what I want,” he told her quietly before she could finish. Once again, he was struggling to pick the correct words to say, and she could see in his eyes that he was attempting to apologize in his own way too. This was probably the first time that she had seen this usually composed and self-possessed man so frazzled, and for some reason, she privately found this rarely seen, awkward side of him somewhat endearing, and it slowly made her feel more accepting of him as she gradually comprehended the truth. Uchiha-san was not an ill-mannered and mean person; he was just somewhat clumsy and graceless when it came to interacting with some people, though she wondered just why he seemed to find it difficult to communicate with her – she had always made an effort to be outgoing and friendly.

 

“It’s difficult for me to look at you,” he admitted then, and before she could take offense at his blunt statement, he continued blithely. “You’re too bright, Haruno-san; you hurt my eyes.”

 

Of all the things that he could say, she was definitely not expecting this. The Biology teacher stared blankly at her raven haired colleague.

 

Eh? Ehh?? _EHH??!!_

 

_Too bright_? What was that supposed to mean? He made it sound like some sort of love confession-

 

Poor Sakura’s mind short circuited then, and the young woman quickly turned a deep, dull red. The fact that Uchiha-san now looked subtly relieved since he had finally gotten the words off of his chest did not ease her embarrassment any, and he was also looking at her in a way as though he expected her to understand the rest of the situation and pick up from there.

 

_But what on earth was this ridiculous situation?!!_

 

“Erm- U-Uh-”

 

_Great_ ; how she was supposed to look him in the eye now?!

 

* * *

_::owari_

* * *

 

 

** Questions That I Would Like To Answer Before You Ask: **

 

Oh dear, it seems that my modernAU!Itachi is turning into something of a dork, hah. He’s such an awkward penguin but I think I like him portrayed like this every once in a while, lol.

 

**xXxXxXxXxX**

 

**Once again, I’m currently not accepting any prompts at the moment, so please do not send me any until I request for them, thanks.**

 

**xXxXxXxXxX**

 

Thanks for your kind understanding, and as always, thanks for reading!! Until next time!!

 

**xXxXxXxXxX**

 

Your reviews fuel my passion for writing. So please leave a comment if you like this fic!

 

\--paws

 


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Random ItaSaku drabbles/onesies featuring various universes and various storylines for your reading pleasure. Chapters may or may not be interconnected.

**Title:** Dessert of the Day

**Author:** paws-bells

**Beta-ed by:** MelissaRose85

**Characters/Pairing:** Haruno Sakura and Uchiha Itachi

**Type:** One Shot/Drabble Collection (InComplete)

 

**Genre:** Romance/General/Humor

 

**Word Count:** 1284

**Rating:** T (Contains content not suitable for children)

**Disclaimer:** Naruto belongs to Kishimoto-san.

 

**Summary:** Random ItaSaku drabbles/onesies featuring various universes and various storylines for your reading pleasure. Chapters may or may not be interconnected.

 

**Created on:** 11/04/14

 

**Completed on:** 11/04/14

 

**Chapter Last Revised on:** 18/06/14

 

* * *

**Prompt: Fantasy AU. Undead!Itachi on date with Sakura**

* * *

 

**  
**This was by far the most awkward date that Sakura had ever been to.

 

The location was also rather alarming, all dark and gloomy and nothing like the cute, charming cafes with their delicious specialty desserts that she usually preferred to frequent. She also felt completely out of place in this oppressive and gothic tavern; her bright, colorful Magical Girl outfit with its dazzling jewels and elaborate, flashy design as well as her cotton candy pink hair really stuck out like a sore thumb when compared to the other patrons, who were all in dull colors and were either hooded or dressed so inconspicuously that she might as well have been a bird of paradise stranded in the middle of a murder of crows.

 

Her _date_ , on the other hand, looked perfectly at home amongst the dismal backdrop, as could be expected from an infamous line of powerful Necromancers. Dressed in unrelieved black from head to toe, the heir to the Uchiha guild was a picture of austere aristocracy, his inhumanly handsome, alabaster features and glowing, crimson eyes marking him as a member of the undead, which made this appointment an even stranger one. The both of them made a rather odd sight sitting across from each other and sharing a meal in dead silence (pun unintended) – Magical Girls and Necromancers were hardly the most common combination, after all, if there ever was one. Sakura was not unfamiliar to his kind though, since one of her best friend also happened to be the younger brother of this man whom she was currently on a _date_ with, though not for the first time, the pink haired female silently lamented her bad luck for landing herself in this awkward situation as well as her general inability to say ‘no’ to the request of her closest friend.

 

The young woman still had no idea why such a powerful mage of the dark occult would request her presence seemingly out of the blue. Even though she had known Sasuke since she was little, Sakura did not have much contact with the rest of his Necromancer clan at all, and had therefore been taken by surprise when the spikey haired Uchiha had come to her a few days ago without their other best friend, the famous protector of the realms, the Sun Knight Uzumaki Naruto, gruffly convincing her to accept an invitation from his aniki. So now here she was, daintily but determinedly chowing her way through a rather unappetizing slab of cold meat pie, bound by common courtesy to finish her food, even as her companion for the evening just sat there and watched her intently like one would a bug under a magnifying glass, his long, narrow fingers interlaced on the table before him, barely even touching the goblet of red wine that he had ordered.

 

At long last, Sakura managed to choke down her dinner, and when she finally set down her fork and dinner knife in relief, her date finally stirred, lifting that uncannily sharp, acutely intelligent gaze of his to meet her wary emerald one.

 

“Would you like more?” he asked quietly, and her eyes widened slightly in alarm. Taking a hasty sip of water from the glass before her, she quickly shook her head, waving a hand in front of her for extra emphasis.

 

“No, thank you! I’m, uh, very full already, Uchiha-san,” she swiftly demurred. Changing the subject before he could insist, she blurted out. “Will you not eat as well?”   

 

The lean, wiry male shook his head once in negative. “I do not consume the same food as you; I apologize for the discourtesy.”

 

Right. The most formidable members of the undead did not require frequent sustenance, and when they did, human food provided little nourishment beyond the basic enjoyment of taste, and what truly sustained them was something else altogether. _Powerful emotions. Pain. Despair. Fear. Terror_.

 

Sakura shuddered inwardly as she remembered this sobering fact. Usually Sasuke would deign to partake in meals with her and Naruto, but she had to remind herself that she was not dealing with the younger brother right now, but the older one whom she knew next to nothing about.

 

“It’s alright. I understand.” There was an awkward pause (at least on her side) as she tried to figure out just what was going on here. For the life of her, she still did not have a clue what this meeting was supposed to be about, and so far, the intimidating raven haired man was keeping a closed mouth on the subject as well. Sakura had no intention of wasting the rest of the evening sitting about in awkward silence while suffering the (increasingly exasperating) scrutiny of the Necromancer though.

 

“…Uchiha-san,” she uttered slowly at last. “Can you at least tell me what I’m supposed to be doing here? Sasuke informed me that everything would make sense when you arrive, but I’m afraid that I’m still pretty much in the dark here.”

 

Itachi silently studied the pretty young woman for a while longer. There was no other way to say it, and so he did not even try.

 

“It has been decided by the Uchiha guild that you will be my wife,” he commented as calmly as though they were only discussing the weather. “Therefore I’ll be courting you henceforth until you agree to marry me.”

 

He probably could have worded it in a less threatening manner and he could have had also let her know the news in a more gentler way, but the Uchiha scion was not exactly thrilled about this situation either, and so the faster he could get it over with, the better.

 

Sakura’s mouth had fallen so wide open that flies could have flown in before she could close it again. The Magical Girl was frozen with shock. “Wait; _what_?!” At the moment, she was more stunned than agitated, though the latter was slowly overtaking the former and it showed on her frowning, perplexed features. “Is this a joke…?”

 

“I don’t make jokes,” he replied stoically in response to her stumped demeanor. “This is part of an agreement between your guild and mine. The strongest of your kind will be joined to the strongest of mine by the bond of marriage. You are the most promising member of your generation, and I am the next in line to lead my clan. This contract has been bound in blood, and your head of guild has also agreed to it.”

 

“What agreement?? And _marriage?!!_ ” Sakura blurted out in disbelief, starting to scowl mulishly and disagreeably as well. “W-Well!! I’m not going to just blindly believe whatever you say!! Are you a lunatic?!!”

 

He tactfully ignored her spluttering insult. “You are free to consult your Guild mistress. Tsunade-sama is fully aware of the details and I’m sure that she will be more than happy to clarify your doubts.”

 

He made the whole thing sound like some kind of simple business transaction, and Sakura could feel her temper rising even further. All semblance of ladylike sweetness and polite civility promptly flew right out of the window.

 

“No!! NO WAY IN HELL,” the feisty pink haired female snapped loudly at last, so agitated that she was starting to glow a bit with her powers and she was even going so far as to make a huge ‘X’ sign with her arms, as if doing her best to ward off the devil. The other patrons were all turning around to stare at the spectacle.

 

“I’m not marrying you even if you kneel on the floor and beg, Uchiha-san, and just for the record, this was the lousiest date I’ve ever had the misfortune of going on!”

 

* * *

_::owari::_

* * *

 

 

** Questions That I Would Like To Answer Before You Ask: **

 

Ahahaha, I think this will be a very fun verse to explore, if my muses cooperate for once and let me write more than one shots and drabbles. Anyway, hope you guys enjoyed this one as always.

 

**xXxXxXxXxX**

 

**Once again, I’m currently not accepting any prompts at the moment, so please do not send me any until I request for them, thanks.**

 

**xXxXxXxXxX**

 

Thanks for your kind understanding, and as always, thanks for reading!! Until next time!!

 

**xXxXxXxXxX**

 

Your reviews fuel my passion for writing. So please leave a comment if you like this fic!

 

\--paws


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Random ItaSaku drabbles/onesies featuring various universes and various storylines for your reading pleasure. Chapters may or may not be interconnected.

**Title:** Dessert of the Day

**Author:** paws-bells

**Beta-ed by:** MelissaRose85

**Characters/Pairing:** Haruno Sakura and Uchiha Itachi

**Type:** One Shot/Drabble Collection (InComplete)

 

**Genre:** Romance/General/Humor

 

**Word Count:** 1773

**Rating:** T (Contains content not suitable for children)

**Disclaimer:** Naruto belongs to Kishimoto-san.

 

**Summary:** Random ItaSaku drabbles/onesies featuring various universes and various storylines for your reading pleasure. Chapters may or may not be interconnected.

 

**Created on:** 12/04/13

 

**Completed on:** 12/04/13

 

**Chapter Last Revised on:** 25/08/14

 

* * *

**Prompt: Sakura wants to get Itachi’s attention and leaves encoded messages for him, knowing that he could decode them. Itachi wonders who these messages, that make his days a bit brighter, are from.**

* * *

 

**  
**There it was again, a simple white envelope sitting on his desk, patiently waiting to be opened by its intended recipient. His name was carefully written on the front in a graceful and neat script, and as always, there was nothing to indicate the mysterious identity of the sender. Itachi took his time to examine the envelope before he finally broke the seal and took out the letter that was tucked within, long, pianist’s fingers carefully unfolding the piece of paper and gently straightening out the creases, deliberately prolonging the anticipation of finally reading its contents.

 

_Dear Itachi,_

_I write because you exist._

_When I met you,_ __  
_flowers started growing_   
_in the darkest parts of my mind._

_You touched me in places so deep,_ _  
_I wanted to ignore you._ _

_Isn’t it funny how day by day nothing changes,_ _  
_but when you look back, everything is different?_ _

_It frustrates me that I have all these words inside of me that you will never get to hear._

 

It had been a few months since he had started to receive these little notes, and he was still nowhere near figuring out the identity of his secretive sender. He had a pretty good guess that his one sided pen pal was a woman, judging by the feminine cursive of her handwriting as well as the whimsical nature of her unexpectedly observant and intelligent notes. Itachi was not a stranger to receiving unsolicited attention from members of the opposite sex – for reasons he did not fully understand himself, he was rather well liked and often earned admiration from the ladies (and the occasional gentleman), experiencing all sorts of adulating behavior ranging from excessive fawning to sometimes downright alarming levels of stalking…but _this_ was something different than the usual, and despite his initial reservations, Itachi found himself increasingly intrigued.

 

_Dear Itachi,_

_I think when you like someone,_ __  
_you are only infatuated with them._   
_When you love someone,_   
_you care for them._   
_Isn’t it that simple?_

_You’re all locked up in that little world of yours,_ __  
_and when I try knocking on the door,_   
_you just sort of look up for a second and go right back inside._

_Sometimes, the sun sets earlier. Days don’t last forever, you know._ _  
_But I’ll fight as hard as I can. I can promise you that._ _

_You are the only exception._

 

The messages always came unsigned, but the quiet intensity and the sincerity of the deeply thoughtful words left a profound impression on him, and Itachi would ponder each and every sentence intently, wondering about the identity of his mystery letter writer in an almost fixated manner that was completely uncharacteristic of him. The raven haired male stared at the piece of paper in his hand for a very long time, silently committing the words and that now familiar, immaculate handwriting to memory. Then, he carefully refolded the note, slipped it back into its envelope, and tucked it safely in his drawer, together with the rest of its brethren. By now, he possessed a rather sizeable collection of letters from his secret sender, and even though Itachi still did not know who she was, he quietly realized that he was getting to _know_ her really well.   

 

_Dear Itachi,_

_It’s so easy to laugh_ __  
_It’s so easy to hate_   
_It takes strength to be gentle and kind._

_I aim to be lionhearted,_ __  
_but my hands still shake and_   
_my voice isn’t quite loud enough._

_What I want is to be needed._ __  
_What I need is to be indispensable to somebody._   
_Who I need is somebody that will eat up all my free time, my ego, my attention._   
_Someone addicted to me. A mutual addition._

_How far should a person go in the name of true love?_

 

Another day. Another note. Once again, he was gently captivated by her words, and slowly, ever so slowly, he was starting to become obsessed with the need to know this fascinating person whose beautifully contemplative, introspective words touched his soul and made his blood stir with a rising anticipation to meet her. It was becoming increasingly difficult to continue to wait for her to show herself to him, and so he consoled himself by rereading her notes all over again, the tiny little pieces of her heart that she had chosen to share with him. There was an understated but intent sort of intimacy in all of her personally handwritten messages to him; he ran his fingers wistfully across each and every line of the carefully penned characters, tried to picture the ardent, passionate woman who wrote such provocative words, and in his mind, her bright and earnest gem-like eyes pierced his own.  

 

_Dear Itachi,_

_We’re all a little weird, and life’s a little weird._ __  
_And when we find someone whose weirdness is compatible with ours,_   
_we join up with them and fall in mutual weirdness and call it love._

_Love is what makes you smile when you’re tired._

_Maybe I need somebody that can save me from the parts of myself that keep making me crazy._

_I do not need someone to complete me_ __  
_but if you wanted to_   
_we could walk next to each other_   
_into whatever is coming next._

_I crave adventure, attention, and you._

 

Somehow, without his knowledge or consent, she had already captured his full attention. He did not want to just sit back and only receive her feelings any longer. He wanted more. Just reading those words were no longer enough. He wanted to _hear_ them as well, directly from her mouth. What did her voice sound like? He wanted to hear her speak his name. He wanted to speak _hers_.

It would not be long now, the day of their destined meeting.

 

_Dear Itachi,_

_It sucks you can’t “make”_ __  
_someone love you._   
_When technically speaking_   
_they made you love them._

_I only want two things in this world._ __  
_I want you._   
_And I want us._

_You deserve good things, and I want to be one of them._

_But you see, there is_ __  
_a graveyard in my mouth_   
_filled with words that_   
_have died on my lips._

_Of all sad words of tongue or pen, the saddest are these, ‘It might have been.’_

_You’ll always be my favorite what-if._

 

This time, it was he who chased after that fleeting flash of pink. As he ran down the hallway in swift, loping strides, his colleagues stared at him as if he was crazy – they had never seen him behave like this before. He ignored the surprised looks and slipped into the elevator before its doors slipped shut silently behind him, and finally, _finally_ , he was looking at _her_. Now that they were finally face to face with each other, he quickly realized that she was even more exquisite than he had initially imagined. Her face was fine boned and heart shaped, her wide eyes were the shade of the purest emeralds, and her lips were full and shaped enticingly like a cupid’s bow. He tore his attention from her mouth and met her stunned gaze with his own instead.

“Your name?” he asked abruptly, strangely breathless, only belatedly realizing how brusque and rude he sounded after he had blurted out the burning question that had been stuck in his mind for what had seemed like ages. Astounding. He was actually feeling _nervous_.

She immediately bowed as low as she could go and just as anxiously stuttered out. “M-My name is- I’m Haruno Sakura.”

_Sakura. So her name was Sakura. And her voice was also lovely and clear, music to his ears._

His tone gentled at her jumpy and cautious demeanor. He had no wish to frighten her away. “…Are you the one who has been writing me letters all along?”

She had not expected to be called out on her little secret so openly, and her face immediately turned a bright tomato red. She could not even look him in the eye anymore, but nodded mutely, her mortified gaze fixed to the ground instead. They were both still stuck inside the elevator – there was nowhere for her to run even if she wished to retreat from this completely distressing situation. Oh god. He knew who she was now.

“I’m sorry,” she burst out at last, her face burning with stark embarrassment. “I never meant to trouble or harass you; I just-”

“I like you,” he suddenly uttered, still looking a bit dazedly at her, and she froze and gawked back at him as if he had just grown two heads.

At that moment, it was difficult to tell who was more mortified. The lightest hue of pink crept across those aristocratic cheekbones of his, and Sakura could only stare at him, entranced by the rare sighting of an embarrassed Uchiha.  

The raven haired male coughed slightly and spoke as calmly as he could, attempting to regain his previous dignity and composure. “Your letters, they were-” Amazing. Incredible. _Captivating_. He broke off abruptly before he could make an even bigger idiot out of himself, and then he was suddenly filled with the urge to drag his hand through his hair. He barely refrained, recognizing it as a nervous tic. His dark, enigmatic gaze focused intently on hers.

“I- Did you really mean every word…?”

She hesitated briefly, still caught by embarrassment, before she nodded slowly, bashful and uncertain now that he knew of her feelings. She bit her lip nervously, and he had a fleeting thought that she was unexpectedly adorable.

“Would you like to have dinner with me after work?” he asked after a thick, awkward moment of silence, sounding about as subtle as a freight train. He really wasn’t very good at this sort of thing, but she privately found this side of him endearing.

She started to smile slowly at him and nodded.

“I’d love to,” she told him, her face radiant with happiness like a bright, blooming flower.

It was the tender beginning of something new and wonderful and marvelous, and just as always, he was giving her something more to write to him about.

And this time, he might just write back.

 

_Dear Itachi,_

_Rules For Happiness:_ __  
_something to do,_   
_something to love,_   
_something to hope for._

_You’re my favorite reason to lose sleep._ __  
_You’re an example of better things to come._   
_I want you to be happy but I want to be the reason._

_It has always been you._

_\- Sakura_

 

_Dear Sakura,_

_I fell in love backwards;_ __  
_I fell in love with words,_   
_that belonged to thoughts,_   
_that belonged to a mind,_   
_that, simply coincidentally,_   
_belonged to you._

_I’m happy that we met. I love you._

_\- Itachi_

 

* * *

_::owari::_

* * *

 

 

** Questions That I Would Like To Answer Before You Ask: **

 

FYI, all the little messages (in italics) that are being passed between our lovely couple are consolidated into note form from random quotes gleaned from various books, movies and the internet by yours truly. Other than for arrangement, I hereby disclaim any intellectual rights to them.

 

**xXxXxXxXxX**

 

**Once again, I’m currently not accepting any prompts at the moment, so please do not send me any until I request for them, thanks.**

 

**xXxXxXxXxX**

 

Thanks for your kind understanding, and as always, thanks for reading!! Until next time!!

 

**xXxXxXxXxX**

 

Your reviews fuel my passion for writing. So please leave a comment if you like this fic!

 

\--paws


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Random ItaSaku drabbles/onesies featuring various universes and various storylines for your reading pleasure. Chapters may or may not be interconnected.

**Title:** Dessert of the Day

**Author:** paws-bells

**Beta-ed by:** MelissaRose85

**Characters/Pairing:** Haruno Sakura and Uchiha Itachi

**Type:** One Shot/Drabble Collection (InComplete)

**Genre:** Romance/General/Humor

**Word Count:** 1148

**Rating:** T (Contains content not suitable for children)

**Disclaimer:** Naruto belongs to Kishimoto-san.

**Summary:** Random ItaSaku drabbles/onesies featuring various universes and various storylines for your reading pleasure. Chapters may or may not be interconnected.

**Created on:** 17/04/13

**Completed on:** 17/04/13

**Chapter Last Revised on:** 01/09/14

 

* * *

**P** **rompt:** **AU. ItaSaku age reversal where Sakura is 5 years older than Itachi.**

* * *

 “Tadaima.”

Sakura looked up from the book that she was reading just in time to see her Uchiha lover step into their apartment. The raven haired male was dressed in civilian clothes so she knew that he had likely just came over from his clan holdings.

“Okaerinasai,” she greeted softly from her seat on the living room couch. She was curled up in the corner and was feeling too comfortable to move, having just returned from her hospital shift a few hours ago. She lowered the medical journal that she had been browsing to give him her full attention. “How was your meeting with your clan?”

The younger male shed his sandals at the genkan and then padded his way barefoot over to her. Now that he was in the privacy of their home, the steely rigidness in him seemed to dissolve ever so slightly, and he shook his head once at her question. “It was the same as usual,” the accomplished ANBU Captain replied. “Some of the elders were petitioning for Chichiue to instate me as clan heir, but luckily enough, they weren’t able to garner enough support to force the motion.”

The pink-haired kunoichi sighed inwardly as she sensed Itachi’s unhappiness at the continuous machinations of his elders to overthrow his older brother and have him become the next leader of the Uchiha clan instead. It was true that the younger Uchiha son of the current clan patriarch was a once in a lifetime prodigy, but his older brother (and coincidentally her Genin teammate) Sasuke was also an incredibly powerful and shrewd fighter in his own right and unlike Itachi, the latter had been groomed from birth to be the heir. Itachi had never had any interest or intention of becoming the next Uchiha leader, but none of the elders were interested in his opinion or wishes and this unfortunate situation had also caused tension between the two brothers, much to the younger male’s quiet distress.

Sakura softly petted the seat beside her and coaxed him to sit. Then, she set aside her book and tugged him down to lay on her lap. He did not fight her and welcomed her gesture, stretching out his long, lean frame along the length of the couch and settling his head on her thighs. She immediately went to work to relieve him of his tension and agitation, deft, slender fingers easing his inky black hair from its tie and then carefully combing through the long raven strands, lightly scratching and massaging his scalp with blunted nails. He relaxed further as she continued to stroke his head, soothing him with her gentle touch. They both said nothing to each other for a while, content to maintain the peaceful silence between them, at least briefly.

Even though the male’s face was placid and inscrutable, his thoughts appearing to be locked away, Sakura had no doubt that he was at the very moment conscientiously inspecting them from every possible angle – there was no way he would let it be since she could tell that he was still quite upset by his prior meeting with his clan. Such was often the case every time the younger man returned from his home, though lately, he had been staying over at their shared apartment more often, shunning the company of his clansmen in favor of hers, and Sakura hoped that she had at least managed to provide him some semblance of tranquility and sanctuary, this genius lover of hers who was always far too smart and too perceptive for his own good, younger than her in terms of age but yet seeming to look even older due to the stress of his heavy responsibilities to the ANBU, his family, as well as his tenuous and difficult position within the precarious dynamics of his clan’s internal politics.

A small frown was starting to knit on his brow then, and Sakura smoothed it out with her fingers. Then, the beautiful woman leaned down and brushed her lips against his forehead softly, before she smilingly rubbed their noses together in an affectionate Eskimo kiss. Her hands tenderly cupped his jaw, stilling him so that their eyes met and she could stare earnestly into his darkened, obsidian gaze.

“Stop that,” she admonished him, her tone firm but stern. “This is _not_ your fault. So don’t start blaming yourself.”  

He said nothing to that, and so she continued.

“We both know that your brother adores you, even though he’s always like that.” ‘Like that’ meaning Sasuke’s usual grumpy and curt self, as everyone well acquainted to the brusque Uchiha heir would know. “You know how he is; the more disapproving and uptight he gets, the more he cares. Sasuke always gets the most anxious when it comes to you, Itachi.”

“I know,” he replied at last, very quietly. “I also want to help nii-san as well.”

Sakura knew how much it bothered Itachi that he was an unintentional cause of Sasuke’s troubles with the clan. “Trust me; your nii-san is aware.” Her tone was patient and good natured – somebody had to be the optimistic, cheerful one in this relationship, after all, and since Itachi constantly considered and fretted about too many things like an old man, that position was up to her to fill. She kissed him again, this time on the side of his mouth. “Set this aside for now; you’re going to get white hairs from all that worrying you do and I won’t be happy if you wrinkle that pretty boy face of yours. Take a nap with me?”

When she asked like that, he could never turn her down. The younger male sat up, then turned to his lover and kissed her with a quiet, needy ferocity that stole her breath away and left her knees weak. It was a reminder that even though he was the younger one in their relationship, it did not in any way mean that he was still a little boy – he had been the one who had determinedly pursued her from the very start, after all. Sakura’s eyelids fluttered and she gazed at him with dreamy, emerald eyes when he pulled back, slowly licking his lips as he did so.

“I think I want you right now,” he whispered, and it was impossible to deny him when he was looking at her with his intent, watchful gaze, the heat of his strong hand on her waist. Her response was to lean in and lay her head against his shoulder, tucking her face into the side of his neck even as she grabbed his hand and helped him push it under her shirt. She did not mind being his distraction at all.

“Do you even have to ask? I’m yours,” she told him softly, only lifting her head briefly so that she could look him in the eye.

“ _So touch me_.”

* * *

_::owari::_

* * *

 

** Questions That I Would Like To Answer Before You Ask: **

Yeah, I’m not really sure about this one, but since I already wrote it, I might as well just put it up, right? Anyway, hope you guys enjoyed it, as always!

**xXxXxXxXxX**

**Once again, I’m currently not accepting any prompts at the moment, so please do not send me any until I request for them, thanks.**

**xXxXxXxXxX**

Thanks for your kind understanding, and as always, thanks for reading!! Until next time!!

**xXxXxXxXxX**

Your reviews fuel my passion for writing. So please leave a comment if you like this fic!

\--paws


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Random ItaSaku drabbles/onesies featuring various universes and various storylines for your reading pleasure. Chapters may or may not be interconnected.

**Title:** Dessert of the Day

 **Author:** paws-bells

 **Characters/Pairing:** Haruno Sakura and Uchiha Itachi

 **Type:** One Shot/Drabble Collection (InComplete)

 **Genre:** Romance/General/Humor

 **Word Count:** 1843

 **Rating:** T (Contains content not suitable for children)

 **Disclaimer:** Naruto belongs to Kishimoto-san.

 **Summary:** Random ItaSaku drabbles/onesies featuring various universes and various storylines for your reading pleasure. Chapters may or may not be interconnected.

 **Created on:** 17/04/14

 **Completed on:** 17/04/14

 **Chapter Last Revised on:** 19/11/16

* * *

**Prompt: Vampire AU.**

* * *

 

“Your blood is unappetizing – I don’t want it.”

It was the last thing Itachi expected to hear. He stared at the Vampire Queen in muted surprise. “Excuse me?” he asked faintly, seeming to have some difficulty comprehending what he had just heard. This was not how he had expected the situation to turn out, and even though he was known to possess quite the implacable and staid personality, right now, Itachi was admittedly baffled. He had chosen to volunteer himself to be the Vampiress’ demanded once-in-a-century living sacrifice, an archaic practice that had persisted in his clan for generations upon generations in exchange for the powerful immortal’s blessing and protection, so as to safeguard his younger brother Sasuke who would have been picked if not for the elder brother’s intervention. The raven haired male had resolved to die for his clan and family this day, offered up to the Uchiha’s supernatural Guardian in exchange for yet another century of peace and prosperity.

He hadn’t exactly anticipated to be turned down flat _because he wasn’t tasty enough_.

Sakura looked at the momentarily perplexed human and tilted her head, lifting her shoulder in a careless shrug at the same time. “You’re kind of pasty and skinny, aren’t you?” she observed in a well-modulated, perfectly accented tone, her preternaturally vibrant emerald eyes glowing as she centered them on him. The pink haired Vampiress was uncannily beautiful despite her unusual coloring, eerily breathtaking and flawless; her skin alabaster white, her figure lithe and willowy. Her face was heart shaped and exquisite, her features doll like and elegant. She moved and carried herself with a languid, feline sensuality, and her appearance was youthful, so much so that if he wasn’t already aware that she was an immortal being who had already lived for more than half a millennia, he would have thought that she was younger than him. There was an unnerving wisdom in her sharp, highly intelligent eyes however – something that felt ancient and very, _very_ old – that belied her youthful physical appearance, though right now, she seemed to be acting more like a petulant child than a wise and aged immortal.

The Vampiress sighed loudly with disappointment, lounging back on her high back armchair as she continued to stare at him glumly like one would a sad scrap of meat. “I already told them I wanted someone more robust, but century after century they keep sending me all the weak looking, runty ones.” That was quite a bold assertion, seeing that the ‘all powerful’ Guardian was a rather petite individual herself, and Itachi continued to stare at her in a wordlessly incredulous manner. “This will not do – I think I’ll have to make a trip down to your clan holdings after all and enquire about their exchange policy.”

The Uchiha scion was becoming increasingly alarmed by the direction of her thoughts. _If she went and demanded to have Sasuke instead…_

“There’s no need for that, my Lady,” Itachi interjected swiftly and decisively. “I assure you that I’m the best my clan has to offer.” Much to his chagrin, she looked dubiously skeptical by his claim, but he continued. “Besides, how can you tell that my blood is unappetizing? You haven’t even had a taste yet.”

Sakura said nothing for a while, preferring to study the lean, lanky male standing tall and still before her instead, boldly meeting her gaze with his own unwavering one. She could not deny that there was a silent strength to him; she had sensed that his will was rather impressive and indomitable, and he also seemed to possess a quiet dignity that was very rarely seen in humans. She was slightly fascinated by his stolid character – most people tended to be scared out of their wits when they were before her but he had been impassive and calm, _very unusual_ – however on the other hand, he was also food, and she really shouldn’t care about how interesting he was, just how tasty he would be.

She could tell that he was hiding something though – he was likely protecting something, _or someone_ – judging by his wary and mildly agitated demeanor when she suggested that she might return him to his clan for another sacrifice. Sakura did not know what his deal was, but at last, she simply replied.

“I don’t need to taste your blood to know that you have been sick for quite some time,” she noted calmly, and he stiffened ever so slightly in response to her astute statement. “You have likely been physically frail since birth, and your lungs are especially weak. You have been unwell for a long time, but the rate of your deterioration has been strictly controlled and inhibited by numerous medication over the years. Without the aid of drugs, you will likely only have a few more years left to live. Am I right so far, Uchiha?”

He was standing completely motionless by now, unable to speak, to defend himself, to refute her words.

Sakura shook her head, her gaze cool. “Has the Uchiha clan fallen so far in their honor that they’d dare try to trick me with an unworthy sacrifice?”

Itachi went completely rigid at that, his eyes flashing, steely with resolve. “It was my decision to offer myself to you, my Lady, against the wishes of the clan. I am Uchiha Itachi, the firstborn of the current clan head and the heir to the Uchiha line. I believe that I will be of use to you, my Lady, if you will give me a chance to prove my worth.”

Sakura cocked her head slightly to the side. “Aren’t you being presumptuous?” she purred archly, silkily. It was a dangerous, predatory sort of tone that could turn deadly in an instant. “Regardless of whatever you say, I’ll still need to feed, you know.”

There was no doubt that he was bargaining with a devil right now. Itachi continued to look steadily at his opponent, well aware that a single misstep here, and his clan would bear the harsh repercussions of his failure.

“I am the only sacrifice that you will get from the Uchiha, my Lady,” he spoke very deliberately, very stilly. Firm and resolute. Unmovable. This was the definite and unyielding decision of the heir. Then, much to her inward surprise, that proud back started to bend, slowly, painstakingly, inch by inch, until he was bowing deeply in submissive obeisance towards her.

“ _Please_ , accept this humble offering, _mistress_.”

Sakura straightened slightly on her seat and uncrossed her legs gracefully, watching him with interest, her gaze unreadable. She tapped a well-manicured fingernail consideringly against her chin.

“My, aren’t you a sly one? You’re forcing my hand here.”

He said nothing, but remained in his subservient position, his gaze fixed passively at her feet.

“I’ll have you die a dog’s death if this is what you continue to insist on,” she commented airily, as if they were discussing nothing more than the passing weather.

“I swear to serve and stand by you loyally and faithfully for as long as I live,” Itachi promised firmly in reply, and he instantly felt the bonds of his vow bind him tightly to her. Sakura slid off her armchair, and glided leisurely over to the Uchiha. Her cool hand touched his face briefly; she trailed her slender fingers along his defined jawline and hooked them under his chin, tilting his head up so that his gaze met hers once more. At this proximity, her unnatural beauty was both heart aching and terrifying, as was the unhuman, feral gleam in her eyes. To his credit, he did not flinch away from her nor attempt to avoid that sharp, overly discerning stare, meeting it with his own placid and rigidly controlled one.

The Vampiress was reluctantly impressed. He was not just all talk only.  

“Very well,” she declared at last, her fingers dropping away from his face after one last, barely perceptible butterfly caress. “I accept your challenge, Uchiha Itachi. Even though you’re like this now, I’ll turn you into the most delicious human, one worthy to be devoured by yours truly. Do you agree with me?”

He looked at her evenly, as the uncertain tension in him slowly started to dissolve into bittersweet relief. “I’ll abide by your will, mistress.”

Her pink lips curled into a sweet, coquettish smile. “That’s a good boy.”

“Now, first things first. I like my food to be healthy, organic and drug free, so that sickness of yours will have to go.”

She made it sound like such an inconsequential matter – and perhaps, to her, it really was. He stared at her in a wondering manner.

“…You can cure my sickness?” he asked, momentarily astounded by the possibility.

She shot him a mildly disdainful look. “Who do you think I am?” she retorted in a way that professed herself the best thing since sliced bread. She was the Uchiha’s Guardian patron, after all; curing him would be a piece of cake.

Itachi still appeared quietly stunned. This was not how he had expected his life to turn out. His briefly startled expression must have been fleetingly clear to his new mistress though, for she smirked at him and drawled chirpily. “What? Did you really think that you’d get off so easily? I only get a human sacrifice every hundred years or so, you know. I have learned to take good care of my toys so they’d last.”

 _Toys_. He was a toy now, _and_ apparently, he was also food as well. Itachi belatedly wondered what he had just signed himself up for.

“Oh, and by the way, I still think you’re a bit too stringy for my tastes-” Without warning, she reached out gracefully and shamelessly groped his behind. Itachi stiffened. “Mhm, yep. You can stand to be beefier, little puppy. We’ll have to work on that~”

The poor Uchiha was very bewildered and disturbed. “ _Mistress_ ,” he bit out, struggling to retain his impassivity and detachment. “Please do not-”

“What are you talking about? You’re mine now, remember?” she asked innocuously, and he snapped his mouth shut, because she was _right_. Still, he was getting rather flustered all on his own though, and something told Sakura that he was going to be very fun to tease; the serious, uptight ones were always the most entertaining, in her opinion. Maybe having him around might not be too bad, after all.

“ _Mou_ , if you’re going to be like this now, I really wonder how you’ll cope when I ask you to scrub my back for me during bath times.”

“…” The rising alarm on his face would have been rather insulting if not for the fact that she could tell that he was just horribly mortified by the very notion of bathing with her, proving without a doubt that he was indeed an honorably raised nobleman from an old and established clan. Sakura hid her smile as she glided ahead of the stumped looking male.

Yes, the next few years might just be very entertaining, alright.

* * *

_::owari::_

* * *

** Questions That I Would Like To Answer Before You Ask: **

Hello, everyone! Long time no see! I hope that you’re all doing well and successfully in all of your respective endeavors!

It has been awhile since I’ve logged onto this account, and even longer yet since I last posted anything for the Naruto fandom. I won’t apologize or make excuses for my extended absence because life sucks (and I’m also very irresponsible), but lately, I’ve been digging into my fanfic folders and unearthing all sorts of old fics (like this chapter) that I have written some time ago but have not yet posted here on FFNet. As such, I’ll be doing so slowly, since I’m also trying to get back into this fandom after just starting to get around to getting over my Very Long Sulk over the Disappointing Ending of Naruto™. I’m still not completely over that, to be honest (I hold grudges like nobody’s business), but I’m also feeling my love for ItaSaku returning so this time I’m going to focus on what I love instead of what I’m (still very) salty about.

**xXxXxXxXxX**

FYI, this Vampire AU was actually written back in 2014 on tumblr, but honest to god, I forgot all about it until recently (a few hours ago, to be precise). Over the years, my fanfic folder has grown into a monstrosity where unedited/unposted/uncompleted works go to die, and when you reach my level of procrastination, that folder has become something where I (irresponsibly) keep feeding but expand NO effort whatsoever into organizing, so trust me when I say that I’m really feeling that agonizing pain of regret now. Rambling aside, I’m wading through folders (and crying) trying to make sense of my own writings, embarrassing as it is to say, but somehow it does feel like my urge to buckle down and write is coming back more and more (fingers crossed!!).

Anyway, back to this chapter; some of you may have already read this before on tumblr, but for the ones who hasn’t, I hope you will enjoy it. The prompt is pretty much self-explanatory. I’m quite bored of seeing the atypical ‘supernatural male protagonist’ plot so mixing things up here had been quite fun to write. Shameless, seductive and bold!Sakura vs. bewilderedly speechless and morally appalled!Itachi is really, really hilarious to envision. Again, this AU feels like something that will be very entertaining to continue – why do I keep doing this to myself???!

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Last but not least, to all the wonderful reviewers and individuals who has unfailingly sent me feedback, PMs and all the warmest regards on various social media platforms over the extended span of my absence, thank you so, so very much for your kind thoughts, well wishes and enquiries. I may not be able to answer all of your messages, but I have received them all with gratitude and thankfulness.

Thanks for all of your patience and kind support, and as always, thanks for reading and fangirling (or fanboying) with me over the years!! Until next time!! :)

**xXxXxXxXxX**

Your reviews fuel my passion for writing. So please leave a comment if you like this fic!

\--paws


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Random ItaSaku drabbles/onesies featuring various universes and various storylines for your reading pleasure. Chapters may or may not be interconnected.

**Title:** Dessert of the Day

 **Author:** paws-bells

 **Characters/Pairing:** Haruno Sakura and Uchiha Itachi

 **Type:** One Shot/Drabble Collection (InComplete)

 **Genre:** Romance/General/Humor

 **Word Count:** 2334

 **Rating:** T (Contains content not suitable for children)

 **Disclaimer:** Naruto belongs to Kishimoto-san.

 **Summary:** Random ItaSaku drabbles/onesies featuring various universes and various storylines for your reading pleasure. Chapters may or may not be interconnected.

 **Created on:** 30/04/14

 **Completed on:** 01/05/14

 **Chapter Last Revised on:** 26/11/16

* * *

**Prompt: Non-massacre AU. Sakura has no idea how to deal with Itachi (who is just like Kakashi in their dislike of spending time being hospitalized) over the duration of his stay in the hospital.**

* * *

 

Onyx eyes narrowed.

He was in a dangerous place right now, entrenched deep within the heart of enemy headquarters. Escape was not an option – not yet, at any rate. The opponent’s stronghold was considerably airtight and once one was captured, there was little to no opportunity for escape. He had been taken against his will when he was injured and unconscious from a mission, and by the time he awoke and was aware of the distressing fate that had befallen him, he had already been thoroughly processed and stuck unceremoniously inside a guarded cell, his clothes and weapons stripped from him and a dismal, flimsy piece of garment forced upon his person instead. The thin, bare fabric was nothing like the lightly armored ANBU uniform that he was used to, and he also felt naked and uncomfortably vulnerable without his usual gear within reach. This was no doubt the deliberate design of the enemy, a cruel and calculated attempt at psychological torture so as to subdue him and force his compliance, but he would not be so easily cowed or defeated.

He had been kept prisoner in here for three days already, and even though his debilitating injuries kept him from moving, he still did his best to closely observe the enemy’s movements, as much as he possibly could, at the very least. From what he could discern, security around the parameters was incredibly tight. Every fifteen minutes, a guard would patrol down the hallway and check in on all the miserable captives kept along that stretch, and every few hourly, a staff would enter the room in which he was kept in and administer a cocktail of powerful, paralyzing drugs into his system. Even here, his great name and infamous prowess preceded him, and it was obvious that his enemy knew just how dangerous he could be if not properly contained, judging by the measures that had been taken to restrain him for the past few days.

But they had made a grave oversight today. The attendant who had been supposed to come by to inject the paralytic agent into him had failed to make an appearance that morning to perform his usual duty, and as such, the raven haired ANBU had felt his strength gradually return to him as the hours ticked by, the immobilizing effect of the drugs slowly but surely wearing off until his body was once more reacting to his commands as per normal. He was still greatly impeded by his wounds, but at least he was mobile again and more than ready to make his move.

Armed with nothing more than several lengths of industrial grade catheters and a bedpan (thankfully empty), he stoically prepared to put his Great Escape Plan into motion. This enemy headquarters was well known to be an impregnable fortress designed to keep people within its walls against their wills, but he had done his research accordingly and its inhabitants would need more than this to trap him in here indefinitely. He fully intended to get out as soon as he could; no doubt this would quickly devolve into an untenable hostage situation otherwise – he was a scion of a great clan of Konoha and therefore he knew that his younger brother would eventually be sent in to negotiate his safe release. He was determined not to burden his otouto due to his own carelessness, and therefore he resolved to make his own escape. Hopefully, his other teammates who had been similarly captured would have also already found their freedom as well.

It took a bit of work and very delicate maneuvering on his part to make his way over to the weakest point of his cell. He could hear the patrol roving outside along the hallway, and therefore he was extremely careful to move as noiselessly as possible. His effort paid off and he managed to find a handhold along the ledge of the ventilation panel at the top corner of the room, though it was quite the challenge hoisting himself up singlehandedly onto the narrow edge.

Unfortunately, before he could completely and soundlessly disappear into the intricate maze that was the ventilation network of the entire building, the door to his cell opened and a very dry, exasperated voice sounded out after a long, irritated pause.

“…Uchiha-san, I don’t know what you think that you’re doing inside the ceiling, but kindly get your prodigious Sharingan-wielding behind back down right now, or so help me god I’ll go up there and princess carry you down myself.”

The long haired male tensed imperceptibly at the dangerously impatient female tone ringing out from directly below him, and if he didn’t have one whole leg set in a cast right now and the opposite arm broken and resting impotently in a sling, the ANBU Captain would have had made a clean getaway long ago, disappearing into the shadows like a ghostly wraith, untraceable and undetectable. Unfortunately, since he was seldom if ever at his peak condition whenever he crossed path with the sharp tongued pink haired witch who also happened to be the beloved teammate of his younger brother as well as the overall in charge of the trauma intensive care unit of the Konoha Hospital, it appeared that his plan for a clean getaway had just been completely and thoroughly thwarted.

The heir to the Uchiha clan kept his cool though, and peered down owlishly at the woman who was scowling lightly up at him at the same time. “Haruno-san,” he greeted cordially and politely, as if he had not just been caught red-handed in the act of fleeing from his hospital ward like an errant child vainly attempting to escape getting its booster shots. “I was checking the ventilation for this room.”

It was the hallmark of a great ninja to be able to lie with a completely straight face, and Uchiha Itachi was obviously all that and more. The petal haired medic nin gave him an incredulous stare for telling such an obvious, barefaced fib, but his expression was so bland and placidly calm as he spoke that it was downright impossible to call him out on it, the weasel (pun fully intended). He was _really_ pushing it, but since this was not the first time that she had dealt with the ridiculous antics of this sort of males, she merely, sweetly, replied.

“No worries. In anticipation of your… _concerns_ , you may be pleased to find that I’ve placed you in the room where the ventilation duct leads straight to the powerful sets of metallic fans that are revolving constantly at full speed to bring you, Uchiha-san, the freshest air that we have to offer. We’ve also placed anti-tampering seals on the fans to ensure that no one will attempt to do anything strange like, say, try to get past them for some reason, so you’re perfectly safe and, uh, well-ventilated here.”

In other words, no way in hell was he going anywhere until she was well and ready to release him. The man was obviously delusional in her opinion – he still suffered from a mild concussion as well as broken bones here and there, and his irrational actions would have led her to believe that he must have had somehow been dropped on his head (repeatedly) on the way back to Konoha, if not for the fact that they _always_ had to go through this vexing conversation (with varying degrees of irritation on both sides) whenever the Uchiha heir landed himself in the hospital after a particularly harrowing mission.

“Are you going to come down from there now. Uchiha-san?” Sakura enquired with saccharine politeness, not at all intimidated by the inscrutable stare that the big bad ANBU Captain was currently leveling at her. “Or do you require my assistance after all?”

He appeared mildly insulted by her questioning of his abilities. Even with one leg in a cast, he managed to land deftly on the ground after lightly pushing off from the ceiling, thereby showcasing the fact that he was still more graceful than the average person even with his current disability. Sakura was even more exasperated, and she motioned for the patient to get back into bed before briskly getting him settled and then checking that he was responding well to the medical treatment so far. He was, and by the time she was satisfied with her general diagnosis and checkup on him, the pink haired female lifted her head to glance at the man only to find that he had been staring at her all along. Or rather, he was _glaring_ at her.

Sakura was taken aback by the unexpected hostility.

“What?” she blurted out as he continued to eye her intensely. “Hey, I know that you don’t like to be in here, Uchiha-san – it’s not like I enjoy your suffering either so you don’t have to look at me like that-”

“Haruno-san,” he abruptly interrupted in an intent, brooding manner. “…You’re a wonderful person.”

Then, he paused after unceremoniously dropping that glowing pearl of wisdom on her, as if waiting with interest to judge her response.

Startled, Sakura’s face turned slightly pink at the random compliment from the ridiculously handsome male, but beyond that, she was not fooled by his lousy attempt at flattery whatsoever. “…You’re that desperate to leave this place, huh?”

“Mere flowers cannot even hope to compare to your sparkling brilliance,” he continued to intone in a flat, completely deadpan manner. “Your beauty is beyond compare; radiant and blinding, and your-”

“… _Stop_ ,” she sputtered out before he could go on to compose on the spot randomly horrible and overly corny poetry of her physical attributes and ‘blossom’-like appearance – all of which she had already heard more than a hundred times over already. “And also, quit glaring death at me when you’re spouting this drivel – it looks really awful.”

His brow furrowed ever so slightly at her feedback, disconcerted that his attempt at _smoldering_ at her had not worked. “I was told that women like it when men stare at them passionately.”

Had Kakashi-sempai given him faulty advice? In hindsight, it really wasn’t the wisest idea to take romantic suggestions from a man who liked to walk about the streets reading porn in broad daylight.

Once again, Sakura shot the socially awkward Uchiha heir a disbelieving look. Then, the kunoichi groaned aloud and shook her head exasperatedly. She really should have known. After all, it was a well-documented fact that the members of the Uchiha clan became most ferociously _passionate_ when it came to the subject of hating or killing something/someone – it was probably even in one of their secret clan doctrines – but this was still pretty ridiculous.

“No, thank you, Uchiha-san. I’m pretty sure I don’t need your brand of ‘passion’ anywhere near me – I may not survive it.” This conversation was actually turning out to be rather hilarious, and Sakura was fighting not to smile at the incredulity of it all. Despite her irritation at the Uchiha’s antics, the man’s sometimes bewildering responses and demeanor were pretty endearing at times, and unbidden, her lips twitched.

“Well, I can see that you are getting better already, if you have the energy to do all these pointless things. Regrettably, I’ve also had you taken off most of the painkillers and sedatives since this morning, so you’re going to be moving around even if expressly ordered not to, am I right?”

Itachi didn’t even attempt to pretend to misunderstand her mildly accusatory words. Sakura’s eye twitched. For all of the man’s tactical genius and fearsome mission records, he was obviously an idiot like his younger brother as well as most of the other shinobi she knew. Seriously, why were all men like this?

“You’re just going to keep being difficult about this, aren’t you?”

He eyed her back calmly. “…Would you like to hear more of my poetry?” he enquired politely in return, and Sakura could not help herself, she snorted with laughter.

“ _Touché_ , Uchiha-san. Fine, you win this time round. I’ll discharge you to recuperate at home. There will be strictly no intense training or exercise for the next one week, or I’ll have you dragged back here and you can recite your poetry personally to Tsunade-sama, are we clear? Also, it seems that your younger brother has received your SOS message and is here to spring you from the slammer – very brave and loyal of him to do so, I may add, seeing that he is due for a full body checkup and has been ignoring summons for the past few weeks.” 

Sakura marked off the checklist on the Uchiha’s patient file and then signed off at the bottom of the release form with a quick flourish. “There. Now you’re soon to be officially free, Uchiha-san. Kindly remember to exit properly from the hospital front doors this time, and not via the ventilation ducts or the side windows, and also tell Sasuke that I expect him to be on time for his medical appointment or I’ll be reserving the largest rectal thermometer I can find for his personal use.”

With that disturbingly friendly, cheerful message that was both impressive and alarming at the same time, the pretty kunoichi turned and started to back out of the room. “Nothing else, right, Uchiha-san? Please stay put for a bit longer and I’ll have someone drop by with the rest of the discharge paperwork.”

Executing a quick, polite bow to her patient, the pink haired medic nin excused herself and left the ward, leaving the Uchiha to stare after her in a reluctantly intrigued manner. The woman was always breezing in and out of places and it was impossible not to notice her – her vibrant coloring and upbeat demeanor was extremely eye catching to him. Much to Itachi’s chagrin, catching her attention was nowhere near as easy though, but just like with everything he did, the ANBU Captain was doing his best.

Perhaps he should try reciting haiku next time…

* * *

_::owari::_

* * *

** Questions That I Would Like To Answer Before You Ask: **

…I really don’t know _why_ my non-massacre AU!Itachi almost always comes out so dorky and socially awkward. I really don’t! Sometimes I feel like I’m ruining his good name and reputation with my quirky ass depictions of him but at the same time I’m also: ┐(‘～`；)┌

Anyways! I hope that this installment has coaxed a few chuckles out of some of you at least. The weekend is finally around the corner again and so I wish everyone a great break from the usual weekday stress! I, for one, am going to be exploring one of my country’s popular attractions: Gardens by the Bay. I have not visited it yet, but I have seen all the pretty pictures online and the place is absolutely _gorgeous_. I’m planning to visit the Cloud Forest, the Flower Dome, and the Supertree Grove. Those of you who are following me on tumblr will probably be seeing quite the picspam of assorted nature and plants over the next couple of days, and I’m also hoping that the experience will gain me some new ItaSaku inspiration while I wander the extensive grounds doing random things like pondering the meaning of life and creepily watching people, heh.

 _Psst!_ What do you guys think of Bee Prince!Itachi, Defender of all Flora, Fauna and Enemy of Litterbugs and Honey Thieves alike! Sakura is already snickering her ass off picturing a nonplussed Itachi all decked out in a bee costume but on the other hand, Itachi’s willing (and resigned) to take one for the team if it’s for the sake of protecting our environment and keeping our world clean and green!

( **Itachi, contemplative:** “I suppose that makes me someone who can float like a butterfly _and_ sting like a bee.”  
**Sakura, with tears in her eyes:** “What are you going to do? _Float_ over in reverse and present your opponent butt first?”  
**Itachi, deadpanning:** “…That move worked when I tried it on you.”)

 _Ehehehe_.

Alright, enough crack from yours truly! You lot enjoy this weekend too and remember to have fun responsibly!

**xXxXxXxXxX**

Your reviews fuel my passion for writing. So please leave a comment if you like this fic!

\--paws


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